Little Nips
by Shieldage
Summary: Xander's usual luck with women brings him trouble when the sun goes down. Amy's not exactly happy either.
1. Moonstone

BtVS created by Joss Whedon and Mutant Enemy. Written for Nerdgirl's "Were-Animals Xander didn't get bitten by" at _Twisting the Hellmouth._

* * *

Xander was annoyed. He had a hot date in a half hour, yet he was stuck in Willow's dorm room changing Amy's cage. Finished or not, the geas hung on him meant he'd be magically compelled to leave then; as per usual his date was involved in the darker side of magics and she needed a small 'sacrifice'. The moonstone on the necklace he was wearing - a 'gift' from her - was gleaming brightly underneath the folds of his shirt.

As the magic kicked in, sweat poured down Xander's face. Wiping off his brow with one hand, he reached down to retrieve Amy from a shoe box and put her back into her minty-fresh home.

Perhaps he wasn't as careful as he should have been. Maybe Amy the witch turned rat was magic-sensitive and the carpenter suddenly appeared to be a threat. Or else he just suddenly smelled very tasty.

"Ow!" Xander yelled and jammed his bleeding finger in his mouth. He pulled it out just as fast. "Ewww! Rat bites should not get anywhere near my Xander-shaped taste buds!"

Without advance warning, he disappeared in a puff of smoke any stage magician would've been proud of.

Willow, hearing the loud _**pop**_, left the bathroom where she'd been scrubbing merrily away. She made it just in time to see a rat scurry under the bed.

After a few minutes of bargaining and borrowed cheese, Willow was able to grab the rat and deposit it into Amy's cage. During the process she noticed that unlike Amy's solid-brown self, this particular black and white hooded rat was male.

A glance in the shoe box confirmed that Amy was still in there and safe. Willow swore something colorful involving jello and dogs, before picking up the phone to call an emergency Scooby meeting.

##

_In one of Sunnydale's more upscale hotels, Serena the enchantress lay waiting. Naked among the satin sheets she always carried with her she basked in the moonlight and waited._

_and waited._

_and waited._

_As dawn began to break in the distance, she cursed the spell that should have drawn the Xand-man to her and began to pack._

##

When the sunlight reached Willow's bed, a very surprised Xander popped back into existence, completely squashing the shoe box he'd been sorted into. Fortunately, he was still fully clothed.

"Okay," he griped, once things had been explained by the gang. "Why didn't you tell me Amy's spell was contagious?"

"It's not, even though last night was a full moon there's no way-" Willow reassured just before the dorm room door burst open and a massive gust of wind pinned all present, including the rodent, up against the far wall.

"That's mine," Serena yelled, eyes blazing as she waved her hand. The moonstone necklace tore its way through Xander's thin shirt and flew to her. "Screw the Hellmouth! I'm going to Seattle!" Sneering, she stormed out.

As she absently pet the recaptured Amy through the usual Scooby discussion of Xander's dating history, Willow put together a brilliant plan.

##

Just before sunset that night, Xander met Willow in her room. "Good thing the moon should be full enough tonight," he said, frowning. "You absolutely sure she's not in heat?"

"Cross my heart and hope to pass out," Willow announced, unwilling to risk stronger language in Sunnydale. "It's about time." She used assorted blankets and pillows to build a 'wall' around the edges of the bed. "Hop on."

"It's not too bad being a were-rat," he said, light-heartedly. "I've noticed a plus-five bonus to my thief and ninja skills, ignore the reference." He made a face just before night officially fell and he poofed into a rat.

Willow happily picked up a spatula and began to spread a peanut butter and honey mixture onto Amy's paws and fur. "If this doesn't work, missy," Willow said, dropping Amy into the bed/valley with Xander. "You're getting a good bath."

When this did not result in rodent-Xander biting Amy, Willow frowned and telekinetically grabbed hold of Xander's jaws. A nip later and – _**pop **_- the still small and furry Xander was sharing the bed with a very naked human female.

Willow swore under her breath and began to fill Amy Madison in on everything that had happened since she'd been trapped in rat form as she filled her arms with fresh clothes. For her part, Amy was taking everything in stride until she realized she was only a were-human and her release from the cage was temporary...

##

"Oh that's such a beautiful tragedy," Buffy announced the next day at the Magic Box. "He turns into a rat at night, she turns into a rat in the day. It's just like_ Ladyhawke_, only, y'know, without the actual romance."

"Yes, quite," Giles commented. "Except she's only able to turn human three nights a month. Simply unacceptable and potentially damaging to the poor girl's psyche."

"We need a way to keep her permanently shifted," Xander mused. "Any suggestions?"

"Oh, I've seen it... here." Dawn grabbed a book and held it open to a particular page. "This is what we need."

"Well, great." Xander frowned. "Anyone else notice that my attempted-date was wearing a pearl ring with those designs? For all I know she's a were-dragon or something off of Gargoyles."

"You know what that means," Buffy asked the room. "Right?"

"Oooh!" Dawn squealed, raising her hand. "Road trip!"


	2. The Squirrel and the Otter

BtVS by Whedon and Mutant Enemy. Short tales written for Nerdgirl's "Were-Animals Xander didn't get bitten by" at _Twisting the Hellmouth._

* * *

**Climbing**

Dawn pulled up to the Magic Box and rushed in, screaming about Xander going into convulsions.

Buffy dropped the book of prophecies she was holding and ran out the door, using her Slayer strength to help Xander out of the backseat of the car.

Unnoticed, a stray gust of wind blew the book to a certain page that gave insanely detailed information of what was happening at that moment.

Unfortunately, Xander and Buffy's return trip through the door created another gust of wind which turned the pages to a mistranscribed recipe for Jell-O.

Anya rushed to Xander and helped hold him down, while a quick-thinking Giles held his jaws apart and laid a broom handle between his teeth. "That should keep him from biting through his tongue," Giles said as he turned to the telephone... Only to hear wood splintering.

By the time Giles turned around again, the painful transformation was complete.

"I told him he should have gone to the hospital, but does anyone listen to me?" Dawn asked, annoyed and worried.

"It was just a nip, no stitches needed. How was I supposed to know it was hungry for more than just dried kiwis?" Xander grimaced, spitting the shattered wood out of his mouth.

Dawn waved her arms with emphasis. "Hello, squirrels are diurnal. Nighttime squirrels are bad - unless they have wings!"

"So, you're sane, right?" Buffy asked, twirling a stake in her hand. "No need for slayage or restraints, right? Wait, does silver work on weresquirrels?"

"No, we need the antlers of the famed Bullwinkle tribe," Giles said, sarcastically. "What? Despite what you may think I'm not a bloody encyclopedia. Right now..." he trailed off, longing for the liquor stashed behind the counter, but unwilling to put his friends at greater risk. "We need to consider what's in the best interest of Xander."

Holding on to the Slayer for balance, Xander pulled himself to his newly clawed feet. Everyone stared at the transformed young man, complete with the fur, buck teeth, tail and black eyes of a squirrel.

Staring into those merciless orbs, Giles felt a shiver go down his spine. Somehow, despite the small stature of real squirrels, Xander had actually grown two inches and they were now at eye level.

Shakily at first, then with surety, Xander walked over and drew a mirror out from behind a cabinet.

Gazing into it, he jumped slightly then rolled his eyes when he realized it was the enchanted mirror that revealed people's true nature. Grumbling, he fumbled behind the cabinet and pulled out a _normal_ full-length mirror.

Buffy decided to defuse the tense atmosphere with humor. "Anya and I have been talking," she said, her arm about the waist of the ex-demon. "An' it's settled. You need to move to L.A. and join up with Angel."

"What?" Xander shrieked, the hairs of his tail bristling in all directions. He paused, looked in the mirror and decided he liked the effect.

"Honey," Anya said. "You need to be in a place with skyscrapers. Sunnydale is just too two-dimensional for you." She held up a bandanna-mask with eye-holes cut in it. "Look, I still have the superhero outfit you used on the anniversary of our first movie-date."

Looking at the sparkle in Anya's eyes, Buffy dropped her arm and side-stepped away, muttering about too much information.

Rupert Giles retrieved his glasses from his face and began to give them a good polish. "Does anyone else find it slightly disturbing that some of Anya's sex toys are in my shop?"

"Ewwww!" Dawn said, backing away from the adults, until her foot bumped a certain book on the floor. "Oh, look!" She picked it up and showed the room the open pages. "Jell-O!"

##

**Deep Waters (200 Words)**

Xander held his breath and dove into the ocean. His webbed feet propelled him forward, his whiskers sensing the currents of least resistance. He scrounged the rocky bottom for awhile before returning to the surface with his prize. Bobbing to the surface he gasped for air before making his way to the sandy shore. "Here you go, honey," he said, presenting to Anya a sizable pearl complete with the oyster that had grown it. She squealed in delight and hugged him.

Xander's furry face gave a half-smile as he patted her back. "I'm glad my being a were-otter helps make you happy but, if it's not too much to ask, could you _please_ 'find' the keys to the boat now?"


End file.
